Eastside Defender

As the Income Tax filing deadline approaches, we at the Eastside Defender remind the bad guys that, according to IRS Publication 17, their booty is subject to tax:

Stolen property. If you steal property, you must report its fair market value in your income in the year you steal it unless in the same year, you return it to its rightful owner.

And also, for elected officials and other guardians of the public trust (outside the gleaming and uncorrupted City of Minneapolis, of course):

Bribes. If you receive a bribe, include it in your income.

Kickbacks. You must include kickbacks, side commissions, push money, or similar payments you receive in your income on Form 1040, line 21, or on Schedule C or Schedule C-EZ (Form 1040), if from your self-employment activity.

Local authorities may not have the resources to prove and prosecute theft, but the IRS is a much more formidable adversary. Remember, they took down Capone.

H/T: This is Just Stupid, via a pally.